Autism and the Rules of Mockery

Most people with an autism spectrum disorder have a history of being mocked by the other kids in school. It doesn't seem to matter whether one has one of the more severe forms, or a high-functioning form such as Asperger's Syndrome with which some can 'pass' as neurotypical ('normal'). Other kids just seem to know there's something odd about us, and some of them, lacking good home training, think it's okay to make fun of us, torment us, and otherwise make school into a foretaste of hell.

I was picked on in school, and I hated it. I was not usually made particularly aware of other kids who were outcasts like me and the subject of mockery, but when I was aware of other kids being mocked, it hurt just as much as if I were the target. I don't claim this as a virtue, it's just an oddity of the way my mind works.

There is one sad exception. Very late in my career as a student, I became aware of another student, a girl, who was gossiped about as being 'dumb'. Now, I was at a Christian school and we were not little children any more, so she was not mocked to her face, just behind her back. I suppose I was flattered at being included in this and so I am ashamed to say I took part in the negative gossip.

But over time as I participated in the dumb jokes I became uncomfortable. I began to realize that some of the kids were amused in an odd way at my remarks. In one case a friend (to the extent I had a friend) wondered at the vendetta I had against this girl even though I wasn't saying any more than the others were.

Now, looking back, I begin to understand that when I was not present, I was also a subject of mocking gossip. Perhaps to a much greater extent than this other girl. The amusement I finally noticed was because one outcast was mocking the other.

The rule of social behavior --- and Christian behavior--- that I learned is to never participate in negative or mocking gossip, and to stand up against it if others do this in your presence. You just never know what others are saying about YOU behind your back; take the high road! I imagine that if I had done so in the incident above, I might have been more respected by the other kids for sticking to high-minded Christian principles, rather than amusing them by daring to mock another person when I was so mockable myself.
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